Tony Freakin' Romo

The Cowboy’s 21-17 loss to the Giants on Sunday may have been a blessing in disguise for the city of Dallas. Scientist believe that if Tony Romo were to have won the football game on Sunday that there would have been a,” Fun Overload.” The last recorded fun overload occurred in 1992 in south central LA when the Compton High School Wild Cats beat Clarksdale High Football team 36-10 which lead to the LA riots. An overload of fun would have brought on mass hysteria in the streets of Dallas most likely leaving hundreds dead and thousands injured.

In an effort to keep kids off of drugs Tony Romo, in association with DARE, agreed to take magical mushrooms prior to the Redskins game on Sunday. During the drug trip Tony Romo played one of his worst games ever losing 27-6. When asked about why he took the drug Romo replied,” If it takes me going out there and tripping off of mushrooms to keep kids off drugs, then that’s what I gotta do.”
Romo had little to play for anyway, having already clinched home-field advantage with the NFC’s best record.

Tony Romo traveled to the North pole on Monday to lay out plans for Christmas Eve’s itenarary for “Santa Claus”. The past 5 years, gifts have been put on homes all around the world due to the right arm attached to the Burleson high school graduate. Tony Romo has a pressing engagement this year and therefore has employed the entire 300 member staff of tonyfreakinromo.com to deliver gifts around the world. During Monday’s meeting, Romo gave all of us our outfits and skis to use for the tricky houses we will be finding in some parts of Peru. If you would like to volunteer for Xmas eve gift delivering, please contact us via the hotline. Must have your own skis to join as Tony Romo needs to concentrate on throwing touchdowns for the next two weeks.

All eyes were on Jessica Simpson last week as she came to Texas Stadium to watch Tony Romo, play for the first time. A first time that turned out to be the worst game of his career. Many are saying that the loss came because of Simpson being at the game, however, TonyFreakinRomo.com has learned that the reason for the QBs performance was that the night before the game Romo decided to break the world record for most consecutive shots of Jagermeister taken in one night. After taking in over 397 shots he may have been a little bit hung over during the game.

A loss also came last year from the Eagles when ex girlfriend and singing sensation Carrie Underwood decided to go to a game. Not taking any chances though Tony Romo has vowed to only date ugly chics until the Super Bowl.

Rumors were swirling around Tony Romo’s mysterious thumb injury. Tonyfreakinromo.com headquarters has learned that Romo actually injured his thumb initially the night before. The event was billed as a way to help out Hispanic youths. In all actuality, it was a way for Romo to let everybody know how awesome his life is going. The event lasted over five hours and apparently put tremendous stress on his thumbs. He has a minor strain in his right thumb, but because of how awesome he is and his life is as well, he will be ready to go Saturday night when the Cowboys visit the Panthers.

Tony Romo is spreading his Christmas cheer not only in the city of Dallas but also in the home of Philadelphia Eagles coach Andy Reid. Romo spent last Thursday mentoring the troubled youngsters as part of his Big Brother volunteer work taking them to Baskin Robbins where he explained to them that they will never be as good as he is but that they should at least try. At first this stunned the kids but then after thinking about it they agreed with 12-1 quarter back and decided to clean up their act. Romo’s next visit with the kids will be this Sunday in Philadelphia.

After failing to find adequate opposition in this year’s NFL, Tony Romo seeks out a tougher opponent. The details are still being worked out through the leagues office, but the game could happen as early as Christmas. Roger Goodell (NFL Commissioner) is quoted last Friday in saying, “It is not fair for the rest of league to have to play Romo every week. It is time for some stiffer competition.” The Fox Robots have been practicing all week and look to give Romo their very best effort.